As the mother of daughters with long hair, I know the battle of the brush all too well. At certain times my daughters have had hair down to their waists, and their hair tends to be thick and wavy. To make matters more difficult, they are the most tender-headed children alive. How do we make it work? Only with a good detangling spray!
Homemade Detangling Spray for Hair (No Tears, No Fears)
As documented in the picture below and in my homemade natural shampoo post, my girls have had long, thick, wavy hair at various points over the years. (Some have even suggested I put hair extensions in their hair for these pictures. Nope, she was three!)
I’ve had to use detangling spray on my oldest daughter since she was a few months old. (She was born with about two inches of hair!) We’ve found a couple of special brushes that really help (especially this one and this one) but they still weren’t enough to convince my daughter not to be afraid of brushing her beautiful hair.
I never liked that most store-bought detangling sprays contain a lot of chemicals, especially since I would need to use it daily on my young kids. At least at the time I started tinkering with this recipe, there were very few natural store-bought alternatives, so I started making my own with just conditioner and water.
This simple combo works pretty well, but I later came across a post on Frugally Sustainable about how she uses marshmallow root in her homemade hair detangling spray. Conveniently, I already had marshmallow root on hand for making our homemade marshmallows. (This is my marshmallow root source.)
The new and improved formula transformed our daily routine. She loved the fresh but light scent and how soft it made her hair (not to mention how much pain it saved her), so she even started using it herself.
And I could save my energy for other more important battles!
What I Did
The recipe continued to evolve for a while as I tried different things from my arsenal of natural ingredients to find the best result. I tried chamomile (known to lighten hair) and nettle (known to help hair growth).
I always feel like it’s a win when I figure out how to make something at home from ingredients I already have and can cross one more thing off my shopping list. There are just 3 essential ingredients (and a few optional ones) in this recipe. Add to a spray bottle, shake, and you’re good to go.
What I Used
This recipe does require the addition of a healthy store-bought conditioner with mostly natural, safe ingredients. (I’ve listed a few that have worked for me below.) Thankfully, there are a lot of reputable companies now that avoid the parabens, preservatives, and heavy fragrances commonly found in store-bought beauty products.
To make this detangling spray, I use distilled water, marshmallow root, conditioner and optional essential oils. Any conditioner will work, but I prefer a natural one, especially for kids. Natural conditioner are more expensive, but with as little as you need for this recipe, one bottle lasts over a year for all three of my daughters.
The top natural brands that I’ve tried that smell good, work well, and don’t have harmful ingredients are:
- Shea Moisture Organic Restorative Conditioner (I love all of their products)
- Max Green Alchemy Scalp Rescue Conditioner (more earthy/tea tree scent but organic and works really well)
- Acure Organics Moroccan Argan Oil Conditioner (light and fresh scent)
I used a glass spray bottle I got during a Zulily sale, but I’ve also used this spray bottle from Amazon and the sprayer actually works better for this.
How It Worked
This detangling spray leaves hair shiny, clean, and smelling fresh. It doesn’t leave hair (even fine kids’ hair) weighed down or oily. In the picture above, I sprayed my daughter’s damp hair with the detangling spray after a shower and let it air dry.

Hair Detangling Spray Recipe
Ingredients
- 1½ cups distilled water
- 3 TBSP marshmallow root
- 2 TBSP natural conditioner
- 10 drops essential oil (optional, adds scent and some hair benefits -- see note below)
Instructions
- In a small pan, bring the water and marshmallow root to a boil.
- Reduce heat and simmer for 20-30 minutes.
- Cool slightly and strain through a cheesecloth or very thin wire strainer.
- While still warm, pour the marshmallow infused water into a glass spray bottle.
- Add the conditioner and essential oils, if using.
- Shake until mixed.
- Store for up to 2 months (this is as long as I’ve tested).
Notes
Do you use detangling spray? Ever made your own? Share below!
Have you ever tried any Yarok products? The Feed Your Ends Leave In Conditioner is my savior. They’re a completely clean, vegan, and organic hair care brand that I wish I could buy all their products but they’re too expensive D: I’m so glad you mentioned Shea Moisture and Acure Organics also, they’re my favorite haircare lines (: But thank you for this recipe! If it works out I can save money by not using my Yarok as often, because I use it as a leave-in/detangler/heat protectant …
You should try cold infusing the marshmallow root. When you boil it, you get some mucilage (the slippery stuff) but you also get the starches from the root. This could be impeding the effectiveness of your recipe. Cold infusing will give you more mucilage, little to no starch.
Can you share how you cold infuse?
I made up a batch of this tonight and I’m excited to try it and see how it fairs with my long, fine, easily tangled hair! I followed the directions carefully and used my favorite organic tea tree conditioner. I strained the mix well through cheesecloth prior to adding conditioner and EO. When I added the conditioner and stirred, shook, even whisked it, I could not get it to fully integrate/ dissolve and the mix appears very “chunky” due to the conditioner. I did let it cool a bit before I added it but I don’t know if perhaps it was too hot or my conditioner just isn’t dissolving as well as yours. Have you had any trouble with this? I tried to re- strain to remove the chunks but it just clogged up the cheesecloth and made a big mess.
Hi Carlie, This same thing happened to me! When I finished the simmering process I had only about 1/3 C of liquid left as opposed to the 1.5 C from the start. Did you find you had a lot less liquid as well??
Yes it did! I actually started out doubling the recipe to begin with because I have long hair and I wanted the spray to last a while. When I was finished it seemed like there was about half of what I had started with and I ended up making a second double batch! Now I have just over a liter, with four batches. I still don’t know what happened with the conditioner, though. I’ve since strained out the rest of the separated, chunky pieces of it. The spray feels nice on my hair and makes it shinier but does nothing to detangle it without conditioner.
Yes it did! I actually started out doubling the recipe to begin with because I have long hair and I wanted the spray to last a while. When I was finished it seemed like there was about half of what I had started with and I ended up making a second double batch! Now I have just over a liter, with four batches. I still don’t know what happened with the conditioner, though. I’ve since strained out the rest of the separated, chunky pieces of it. The spray feels nice on my hair and makes it shinier but does nothing to detangle it without conditioner.
Try adding more water to bring it back to about 2-3 cups and then wizz it in the blender
Might be because your conditioner wasn’t natural. Certain synthetic ingredients may not fully dissolve or incorporate from the nature of the ingredients meant to coat to the hair.
I’m so excited to try this recipe for my 4 year old daughter, who also insists on having hair down to her waist, but hates letting me comb it! I’m just wondering if Marshmallow leaves would have the same effect as Marshmallow root, since all I can find in my town are the leaves… Thanks!
This is a God-send! My 6 year old daughter also HATES having her hair brushed but INSISTS on keeping it down to her waist. Brushing is usually ok on washing days but in between can be rough, especially when she’s had her hair loose all day. I’ll have to try this. Just not sure where to find marshmallow root here in Israel. The hunt is on!
Go find it in Gaza..
Why did you remove the nettle from the recipe? Love Shea Moisture products to have on hand too!
I made this yesterday and I think it came out ok. I tried it on the kids last night and their hair combed right out. I only used one tbs of conditioner because they have fine, thin hair and it seemed to be enough. I can’t wait to try it on myself!
I am a stylists with curly hair, and I also have a “tender headed” 3 yr old daughter with curly hair who’s hair is even at 3, way thicker than mine! And after a year and a half of fighting and crying at bath time, I found the book “curly girl” by Lorraine Massey. She to believes in a more natural non toxic approach. The book is great. I went as a stylist and invested in a class she offers on cutting and washing curly hair. It has really changed our hair lives lol. I remember BEING one of those tender headed kids. Ironically, the main thing she teaches is to leave a good amount of the conditioner in the hair. And sprits the hair and scalp on non washing days with distilled water with lavender oil to eliminate
BO. Which both main ingredienst in your detailing recipe.
The Curly Girl book changed my hair life too 🙂 so much easier than the years of misery and amounts of money I spent fighting my curls. Now I take better care of my hair.
I made this detangling conditioner tonight. It is amazing!!!! I was using a mix of water and ACV as a detangler and it worked pretty well. but still lots of tears. even with the special hairbrush mentioned above. That brush did cut brushing time in half though. And this wonderful conditioner cut brushing time in half again. It is still a struggle, but at least it is only a struggle for 1/4 the amount of time. Thank you, Wellness Mama 🙂 and my 2 and 4 year old girls thank you also.
Oh Katie McGee, I wish you lived by me!!! (Do you happen to live in Utah?) I think having a stylist who understands curly hair is priceless. I just do not feel like people who do not have curly hair get it fully! So awesomeness. And I am so getting that book.
how do you make this with the nettle. my daughter’s hair is still super fine and thick, like baby hair, but she is 8. i’d like to do anything to help her hair growth and fill in more completely.
Just simmer nettle leaf in to the water and strain before using. Gelatin and omega-3 internally can also help with hair growth
How much nettle leaf would be good for this specific recipe?
Just need to jump in, Omega 3 clarification should be always have it in natural form eg: white fish, shellfish etc not the oil as it is processed to stay liquid and is a dangerous trans fat. (PUFA) oxidizes in your system
How do you know how much nettle leaf to use. And, can you use whole nettle leaf or powder?
Thank you! COuld you please fix the link for the spray bottle from amazon? It links to Shea Moisture baby ointment. I have long thick very curly hair and have been using Mane n Tail detangler because I couldn’t find a natural recipe that worked. Will definitely give this a try.
Glad to hear it wasn’t just me. I was going to order this bottle for my daughter’s hair.
Fixed 🙂
Did you use whole Marshmallow root or the powder?
Either will work as long as it is strained out really well but I use whole
Could you use Marshmallow root extract? If so how much should you use? I found this on amazon called, “Nature’s Answer Marshmallow Root”.
I haven’t tried that but it might work… It is in liquid dorm so you might have to experiment with the amount, though. Let us know if you try it, and how it works!
I’ve never worked with and don’t understand the marshmallow root thing, does it dissolve in the water or do you just leave it floating around in the bottle? –Thanks
No, it doesn’t dissolve…but it does produce a “gel” like substance when you cook it. you will need to strain it though. Whatever doesn’t go thru the strainer gets tossed out. The rest you would add to the bottle, along with whatever conditioner and/or oils you want.
Just an FYI this is not a Natural Conditioner, I really appreciate your recipe with the exception of “adding conditioner” Commercial conditioner has additives ( preservative that are not natural among other unhealthy additives) To have a natural product everything added should be all natural. With that being said, I made this detangling spray omitted the 2tsp of conditioner of your choice, and it turned out great !
There are conditioners which are additive free out there.
How many drops of essential oil is a good number to add?