Why I Don’t Post About My Kids Online

Katie Wells Avatar

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Why I Don't Post About My Kids Online
Wellness Mama » Blog » Motherhood » Why I Don’t Post About My Kids Online

If you’ve read much on this blog, you might have noticed that I don’t post many details about my kids online, other than very general information about how my 4-year-old helped me clean or how one of my kids once spilled activated charcoal all over my kitchen.

I am *hopefully* going to give birth sometime in the near future to baby number 6, and while I will share my birth experience and maybe even a picture of the birth or our baby, I won’t be sharing the name, weight, or even the exact birthdate. There won’t be a cute birth announcement online (even on my personal social media accounts), and I’ll just share our happy news with friends and family via phone, text, or email.

But Why Not Share?

I get a surprising number of questions about the lack of photos and details about my children both in the comments of the blog, and on social media, with some commenters even going so far as to claim that I must not really have children or that I am ashamed of them. My personal favorite is when someone comments that I must be a bitter, single old woman using someone else’s photo to make money online. Hilarious!

The truth is that I am super-proud of my kids and would love to plaster my blog and social media with pictures of them, but I don’t. In fact, I don’t even post about my kids on my own personal social media accounts as this was a decision my husband and I made for our family after a lot of thought and research.

Before I explain, I want to make it very clear that this is a personal decision that my husband and I have made for our family. I am sharing because I have received so many questions about why I don’t post about my kids (and in anticipation of requests to share a photo of new baby). This post is not, in any way, a judgement or a reflection of any other parent’s decisions about posting about their child online, just an explanation of my personal policy on this.

It Isn’t My Right

We live in a unprecedented time in technology and face decisions that our parents didn’t even have the need to consider. None of us (unless you are a lot younger than I am), grew up with our parents having smart phones or posting our pictures on Facebook.

In fact, if you were like me, the closest our pictures came to being “shared” or “liked” when we were kids were when friends and relatives would visit and parents would bring out the ever-dreaded scrapbooks. The physical scrapbooks or “baby book” that had hand-cut printed photos and lovingly worded captions to chronicle our early lives.

They didn’t post these online for everyone to see (because the web wasn’t around yet!) and in a sense we grew up in a safe and protected bubble compared to what our children face today. For me, widespread access to the internet and social media took off while I was in college, so while my first employers could have Googled me, the most they would have found is high school or college graduation announcements or achievements in my adult life.

The same won’t be true for the current generation of children. Future friends, employers and spouses will be able to Google them and potentially find pictures of their birth, or when they were potty training, or baby bath pictures or embarrassing childhood temper tantrums. Those personal childhood moments that we can safely relegate to scrapbooks or photo-albums may be very publicly available for our children.

To me, though I have the responsibility and honor of raising these tiny humans, I don’t “own” them as they are individual human beings who will one day be much more in life than just my adorable baby. While I get to make some really important life decisions for them, like what I feed them for dinner or how they are taught about life and morality, I decided to leave the decision of how and what their online presence would look like to them. And I hope that this is a decision they will make carefully after much thought once they become teenagers or adults.

Here’s the thing… I’m a pretty private person myself and while I share a lot on this blog in hopes of connecting with other moms and helping other families, I’d be pretty upset if someone was sharing pictures of my bad days, or going to the bathroom, or even just personal details without my permission.

I want to afford my children this same respect and don’t feel that I have the right to decide for them what part of their lives become permanently available online.

While we, as moms, are somewhat “the Facebook generation,” a lot of today’s teenagers are choosing social media (like Snap Chat) that offers more privacy and anonymity. I want to consider the fact that my children may one day value online anonymity even more than I do, and they may not have wanted me to post about them on social media or other online forums.

It Can’t Be Un-Done

As a child, I read a story about a woman who often gossiped, and to illustrate how destructive this could be, she was instructed to go to the top of a tower and tear open a feather pillow and scatter the feathers into the wind. She was then to come down from the tower and attempt to collect every single feather.

The moral of the story is that painful words could not be taken back, and that the damage can spread far and wide. I think this same analogy can apply when it comes to the internet.

As all too many teenagers have learned the hard way, it is not always almost impossible to undo things that have been posted online. Others can take screen shots of pictures so even if they are deleted, a copy will remain. Harsh words can immediately reach hundreds or thousands of people and not be taken back.

In an online world where everything can be cached, archived, and stored in the cloud, we have to assume that anything we post online will be permanently available in some form. This certainly goes for adults too, but I feel that it is even more important with my kids.

As I said above, I don’t feel that it is my right to share about my child’s life online and a large part of the reason is that they won’t be able to undo or un-share the things I’ve posted about them should they desire to do so when they are teenagers or adults. As we are the first generation to really face this transition, I have to wonder how our children will feel about this when they are older. Only time will tell, but for now, those are some feathers I’m trying not to scatter into the wind on behalf of my kids.

Is Over-Sharing Dangerous?

I am sometimes amazed by how much I know about friends and family members who I haven’t actually had a face-to-face conversation with in years. In fact, it is sometimes awkward to run into friends I haven’t seen in years and have trouble making conversation because thanks to Facebook I already know their children’s names, that their dad died last year, and that their neighbors are having marital trouble.

I don’t say this as a judgement in any way and certainly understand the desire to share on social media. In most cases, the over-sharing is completely harmless, but I wonder if in the hands of someone who didn’t have good intentions it would remain so.

For instance, I’ve read many stories of investigators who (in order to show the potential dangers of social media to parents) were able to find everything needed to abduct a child from a parent’s social media account. Thankfully, in the examples I’ve heard, these were police officers making a point and not child predators, but it raises some interesting questions. But if a police officer or investigator can find a child’s name, birthdate and school from a parent’s social media posts, it seems logical that a predator might be able to as well.

Am I being paranoid? Maybe… but maybe not.

Identity theft is another potential concern for me. Think about this… If the details of a child’s life have been shared on social media from birth, a person could potentially find that child’s date and time of birth, eye color, hair color, photos, school location and home address online.

Think about this too… many people use a child’s name or birthdate or some combination as the password for various internet accounts. Many of us have a maiden name on Facebook to be able to find friends. Many of us list our past places of employment and residence in our Facebook “about” section or LinkedIn profile. How many of your security questions to online accounts could someone answer with that information? How many of us have taken online quizzes or filled out those “21 Facts About Me” that just happen to coincide with common answers to security questions.

I personally know people who have had their accounts and lives hacked and suffered for months trying to clean up the damage. They eventually found out that the hackers were able to get in by using publicly available information that they’d posted online to answer security questions and get into their email. From there, the hackers could reset other passwords and gain access to other accounts.

Is that likely? Hopefully not, but I’ve seen first-hand that it is possible. I also know people who have had their child’s personally identifying information stolen and used in tax fraud, credit card applications, or other fraudulent ways.

I know that I definitely err on the side of extreme caution, but I’d rather do this than the alternative, especially when I’m talking about my children.

Online Privacy is a False Security

I have my personal privacy settings on all social media set to the highest settings so someone can’t even find me or view my profiles without already being friends with someone I know. I feel that this offers a false sense of security though, since many people still post sensitive personal information assuming that it is protected by our privacy settings.

At the same time, these settings are changing constantly. Every few months I re-check these settings and sometimes discover that thanks to a recent Facebook update (or any other social media account for that matter), things that I’d previously hidden from view with privacy settings were now publicly available or that it is no longer possible to stay hidden in some searches. I also actually read the privacy policies and realize that we aren’t really as safe as we think we might be.

With the addition of facial recognition software online and in social media, privacy is further blurred. Online algorithms can now suggest that we tag friends in pictures and determine who our closest friends are based on shared photos and status updates. This creeps me out somewhat when it happens to my own photos, but it is definitely something I want to prevent for my children (because again, it can’t be un-done).

In fact:

There’s a more insidious problem, though… Myriad applications, websites, and wearable technologies are relying on face recognition today, and ubiquitous bio-identification is only just getting started. In 2011, a group of hackers built an app that let you scan faces and immediately display their names and basic biographical details, right there on your mobile phone. Already developers have made a working facial recognition API for Google Glass. While Google has forbidden official facial recognition apps, it can’t prevent unofficial apps from launching. There’s huge value in gaining real-time access to view detailed information on the people with whom we interact.

Could any of us have predicted when we were growing up what our digital lives would look like today? I certainly couldn’t have.

We truly have no idea what the future of technology holds for our children or what it will look like a decade from now. I’m personally trying to guard their future privacy (and right to decide their own online sharing) in the only way I know how- by keeping their information offline until they decide they want it there.

The Reality of Online Judgement

We’ve probably all seen the heartbreaking stories of kids who were incessantly bullied online. Some of these children have even been driven to suicide by this online bullying (including a girl who killed herself after being shamed online by her father). Statistics show that kids use social media metrics as a real-life measure of their likability and worth as a person. This can certainly have its consequences and is a cautionary tale for us as parents, but many experts think that the same thing is happening (on perhaps a more subtle level) with adults too.

While most parents once reported being secure and relatively not-stressed about their parenting decisions, many parents now call parenting “stressful” and “complicated.”

One possible explanation experts give? That we are constantly being judged by our online parenting choices, since social media has become an un-official second opinion. I’m not just talking about the heated debates that rage on controversial topics where parents blatantly call each other names and claim that CPS should take their children away for their poor choices. I’m talking about the more subtle comments on day-to-day posts, the number of “likes” (or lack thereof) and the more passive aggressive feedback that makes many of us feel the need to constantly showcase our good parenting moments online.

Why do we feel the need to wish our children (even ones who aren’t on social media) a happy birthday or congratulate them on a sports win? Especially considering that our kids are often either too young to read these posts (and not on social media yet) or old enough to be embarrassed and annoyed that we are tagging them at all?

Could it be that we crave the likes, comments and positive feedback?

I get it. Parenting is hard and positive feedback is helpful. I definitely bounce ideas off of friends or ask for advice in person. I just try really hard not to use my kids as a means for social affirmation.

On the flip side, even as an adult and parent, I know the pain of online judgement and how hard it can be to face that daily. We hear the news stories about teenagers and online bullying, but the same thing happens daily among adults. I don’t post much on personal social media but from my years of blogging, I am very aware of just how hurtful and hateful people can be on the internet (and how amazing most people are!).

I have gotten actual hate mail from people simply because they disagreed with my food choices, my outfit in a picture, or the fact that I avoid iodine with my thyroid problem. I’ve actually had someone email me that they hope I “choke on a piece of meat and die and then catch fire in a fur coat” because I posted this recipe. Seriously.

Other People Probably Don’t Care

With all the above reasons that online information can be potentially mis-used, I feel it is important to touch on a much more likely option that my younger (unmarried with no kids) brother often reminds me of.

Most people just don’t care about seeing pictures of my kids (or dog, or house, or anything else) every ten minutes on social media. That isn’t to say it is a reason not to share these things, but it is a running joke of sorts about how the Facebook news feed is just for pictures of people’s babies, cats and dogs.

Harsh though it may be, none of these people really care that much about our kids or pets. They certainly don’t care as much as we do. Of course, there are grandparents and family members who absolutely do and who love to see hourly updates of our kids, and I’m definitely not saying we shouldn’t share them.

I just *personally* prefer to share the pictures and cute things my kids say with their grandparents and aunts and uncles via text or email rather than with the whole world via social media or my blog. My parents love seeing pictures and videos of when a grandchild learns to walk, or read, or anything else really. They love videos of my kids belting out a favorite song and I share it with them. The rest of the internet doesn’t really care (and it’s none of their business), so I don’t share it.

You Just Never Know

I know many things in this post seem alarmist and I don’t mean it that way, but I do think that you never truly know the potential consequences until they happen. Something may be a very low risk, but if you are the one it happens to, the statistics don’t matter.

A few years ago, I hemorrhaged and had an emergency c-section from an undetected placenta previa at 35-weeks gestation. I’d had an ultrasound and regular prenatal care. I’d been checked multiple times. I had none of the risk factors. Do you know what the odds are of an un-detected complete previa at 35-weeks with my risk factors? Really, really low. Unfortunately, that statistic did little to help when I was bleeding. Not to be dramatic, but just to illustrate that statistics are only helpful if you are in the “safe” percentage.

Sure, the *fictional* story that circulated about the mom who posts a picture of her daughter on the first day of kindergarten on her Facebook profile only to have it stolen by a sex trafficker who now knows where her daughter is that day and goes on to abduct her and sell her into the sex trafficking industry is far-fetched and extremist. At the same time, how many of us have posted bath or beach photos of our children nude or almost nude that could end up in the hands of someone we wouldn’t want to see them.

The statistics are small and many stores like the one above are drastic and alarmist. I typically try very hard NOT to be over-protective of my children. They know how to safely use kitchen knives. They play in our backyard without me following 10-feet behind them. When we camp, they take short hikes around the woods without us. They build fires and carve sticks when we camp. Heck, I even let them make the decision to eat “un-healthy” food that I wouldn’t choose for them so they learn about making good choices and accessing risk in real-time. I don’t consider myself over-protective in the least when it comes to these things because they relate to real life skills.

I don’t consider being on social media an essential life skill and have yet to think of a single important life lesson my children miss out on by not being chronicled from birth online. Yes, the real risk of actual harm to a child from being shared online is small, but I also don’t see the benefit of over-sharing. To me, this is one area where I can easily protect my children without them missing out on anything important, so I choose to do that.

We also know that much online data, especially that shared on social media or that can be indexed by search engines, is stored in data repositories and can be archived indefinitely. We don’t (and can’t) know how this information may be used in the future and if we can ever remove it.

I’m not Anti-Social Media

I feel it is important to clarify that this decision does not stem from a dislike or fear of social media at all. In fact, I was on Myspace and have had a Facebook account since 2005, when it was only for college students who had a .edu email address. I still use many personal social media accounts to keep in touch with close friends and family, and for blogging.

I think social media is an amazing tool, when used correctly. At the same time (and perhaps because I’ve been using it for over a decade), I’ve seen some of the negative and unfortunate things that can happen when young children are allowed to share too much online too soon.

I won’t keep my kids off social media forever as I’m not opposed to their using it when they are older and responsible enough. I just don’t personally want to put them on there until they can make the decision themselves since I want to help them form a good sense of judgement and responsibility before giving them a tool like social media to use.

Bottom Line

At the end of the day, the central reason I don’t post pictures, names or information about my children online can be summed up in this way: I am not my children and I don’t feel that I have the right.

My children are individuals and I feel that they have the right to this privacy. They may currently depend on me to provide and protect their basic needs and rights, but one day they will be autonomous adults who may not have wanted their childhood chronicled in such a public way. I had the safety of a childhood that wasn’t publicly chronicled and I want to offer the same to my own children.

Don’t get me wrong… I take all. the. pictures. And make all the scrapbooks. They’ll have a detailed photo record of their childhood if they want it… it just won’t be online.

I also feel that there is a balance, even for me. I share pictures of them doing activities on social media, I just don’t show their faces or use their names. I talk about them in a general way. If you want to, you could find more pictures of my daughters’ hair than you’d ever care to see. I’m not perfect with this policy and I did share some pictures early-on in my parenting days (that have been mostly removed now). I just try really hard to afford my kids some online privacy, especially while being a “mama-blogger.”

I know I am in the minority in my decision, as 97% of U.S. moms who use Facebook report that they post pictures of their children online. I also know that just sharing my opinion is likely to open me up to some of the same criticism and online judgement I always hope to avoid, but since I have received so many genuine questions about this, I wanted to share my perspective.

Again, I’m sharing my own research and opinion on this matter and the post is titled “Why *I* Don’t Talk About *My* Kids Online” and not “Why YOU Shouldn’t Talk About Your Kids Online.” I don’t mean for this post to be controversial, though I suspect that it might be. I don’t mean this post as a judgement of any other mom… we all deal with that enough!

If you disagree with my stance on this issue, I’d love to hear about it and talk with you in the comments. All I ask is that we all keep it respectful and talk in a way that all of our children will be proud of.

Do you share about your kids online? How and why did you make this decision? Please weigh in below!

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Katie Wells Avatar

About Katie Wells

Katie Wells, CTNC, MCHC, Founder of Wellness Mama and Co-founder of Wellnesse, has a background in research, journalism, and nutrition. As a mom of six, she turned to research and took health into her own hands to find answers to her health problems. WellnessMama.com is the culmination of her thousands of hours of research and all posts are medically reviewed and verified by the Wellness Mama research team. Katie is also the author of the bestselling books The Wellness Mama Cookbook and The Wellness Mama 5-Step Lifestyle Detox.

Comments

251 responses to “Why I Don’t Post About My Kids Online”

  1. Tanya Avatar

    Thank you for this post! I agree with what you have written and truly appreciate the time and thoughtfulness you and your husband are demonstrating in making this decision for your family. You of course don’t owe anybody an explanation for how you choose to raise your kids – mommy blogger or not – but I appreciate your finesse and poise in dealing with those who may criticize or not understand your choice. Our children are gifts and we are accountable for the choices we make for them at this juncture of their lives. It is right for us to look ahead at how they may react to or feel about the choices we have made for them at a young age that may effect the trajectory of their lives in the long run. I applaud your caution, candor and transparency.

  2. Becky Dockrey Avatar
    Becky Dockrey

    My daughter is the lead reporter for our local newspaper and she met with police on a story about this very subject. They revealed things to her about how easy it is for predators and potential kidnappers to get to your children thru information on social media. It doesn’t seem to matter how private you have your Facebook account either. These predators have ways of getting thru all this and if you have location services activated on your device then it is all the more easier for them to find your children. It scared her so bad that she immediately stopped posting pics of her daughter and asked me to not post anymore either…which I have not done. We have to protect these innocent children from all this evil that is out there as much as we possibly can. Thanks for addressing this, Katie !

  3. Terri Avatar

    This doesn’t just extend to social media – you are right to be private about your family. My daughter dated a boy in high school whose mother broadcast everything about their family to anyone who would listen. This boy was mortified and rightly so. She felt it was her right to reveal everything – not so! Someday your children will thank you for this. Only talk about them in general terms. Kids need privacy too.

  4. Danielle Avatar

    Did this post get removed from your Facebook page? I reposted it to my page and that post isn’t showing up, either. Did Facebook remove them????!!!

  5. Cindy Avatar

    Excellent article. Parents take note.

    I personally eschew social sites for many of these reasons mentioned in Mama’s article.

  6. Melissa Avatar

    I love this article wellness mama! You explained this is a way that I’ve been trying to for years with my family and friends. Both my husband and I don’t even have a Facebook or any other form of social media. You know why I dont? My parents never allowed it and gave my sisters and i a thousand reasons just like what you explained. When I was in high school it was MySpace that was popular, so when college came along and all my friends jumped on the FaceBook band wagon- I never did. Why? Because I could hear my dads words cautioning against it. Once I became a mother 5 years ago, we had so many friends and family members begging us to get FaceBook so they can see pictures of our first child. We refused, it didn’t feel right to exploit my innocent little baby. Now wih a couple more children- we still feel the same. I get made fun of all the time for being too paranoid, or “out of touch” with the world because im not on FaceBook. I feel it’s the opposit- I live in reality and connect with people in a very real way. i may not be the first to know out of my friends who got engaged or had a baby bc I didn’t see the post first but I find out from a phone call instead, which to me is so much better. I’m hoping by me not having Facebook or anything like it, that my children will take example from me when they are older and make the right decision for their safety and privacy. Or if they choose to be on social media- perhaps they will use caution with what they post because they didn’t have parents posting their entire life on the Internet.

    Thanks for writing this article! Glad to know I’m not alone.

  7. Morgan Avatar

    This is brilliant. I am so glad I read it. I hardly ever post family pics to FB, but recently posted a silly video of my 14yr old son being silly. It will be removed asap.
    Thanks, Katie!

  8. Mary Avatar

    I completely agree with you and I have been doing the same since the beginning of my blog – since my son was 6 months-old. Even after the start of new social media platforms, I kept their identity anonymous. I’ll be honest, I don’t like to share my own face that much either. For my kids though, I had the same concerns as you. I thought my blog isn’t focused on my children but being a parent. In no way, do I feel I have the right to criticize others who do share but it’s my personal choice not to share mine. At 10 and 8, they are very much aware of this particular choice of mine and I tell them when I will share their photo during their activities. Sometimes, they ask me not to, which then I comply with. Other times, they recommend to setup this was or that way to make it better. 🙂
    I hope my example will also help them develop healthy (or at least what I think is healthy) habits when they are old enough to have their own social media accounts.

  9. Stephanie Town Avatar
    Stephanie Town

    AMEN sister! I stand behind your decision 100 percent. What you feel is right for you, is no one elses business.
    I am not on Facebook, and will never be. 🙂 Im sorry for the hate mail you have received, that’s just terrible. I think you are awesome.

  10. Nicolette Avatar
    Nicolette

    I have never posted any comments on anyone’s blog before now. I just had to say I agree with you 100%. Everything you said is so true! Some people might think it’s fear driven and wether it’s fear or not it is still not our right to post a bunch of stuff about our baby’s! I’m glad my parents didn’t have social media cause I can tell you I would not have liked them posting pictures and comments all over the Internet about me! I’m more of a private person and I would hate if there was a bunch of pictures and info about me as a kid out there!
    I love your blog and can’t believe you have people saying such mean things to you! All I can say is people are really bored and have nothing better to do!!! Keep up your awesome work!

  11. Will Avatar

    Dear Wellness Mama,
    I love your site and it is very informative to my health.
    I want to start my own blog and am amazed at how incredible yours is? Im a bit intimidated. How do I learn it all? Do you have any resources or websites you learned from?
    Also, any tips for getting traffic starting from zero?
    Your website design alone is incredible

  12. Terelyn Avatar

    I’ve been reading your blog for a few months, and I don’t mean this in a bad way, but I’m actually *happy* not to see your children’s faces plastered on your web site for all the reasons you stated above, as when I do visit someone’s blog and see their children, I feel like I’m invading their personal space and it’s almost embarrassing. However, if I happen to have a close relationship with someone, as on Facebook, then I feel better about it.

    Anyway, I salute you, Wellness Mama, for protecting your children and giving them the privacy they deserve. Best wishes to you with the rest of your pregnancy and delivery!

    P.S. – I happen to be single (divorced), middle-aged, with no children (have nieces tho), BUT I think being a mother is your #1 job when you have children, and I think you’re doing a good job of it.

  13. tracey Avatar

    Katie iv read your posts for over a year now, and always wished i had your insight into natural ways of living. Im always blown away by what you manage to achieve and the pure gems you come up with in leading an informed and natural life. This is the first time i have left a comment on any of you posts but you have done it again i agree with you 100% neither myself or my husband care much for social media although without it i would never have stumbled upon your sight wich i do visit everyday, but people unwittingly offer up sensitive information about their and their kids lives without really thinking about the consequences it can hold. Thank you again and god bless with baby 6

  14. Mic Avatar

    Thank you for putting so nicely what I have felt since my son was born two years ago. My husband and I decided that we would not share name or pictures on any SM. Besides the reasons you mentioned another big one for us is our son is adopted. We have regular email contact with his birth mom we share many experiences and pictures but would not want any of his birth family to have access to him in such an informal way as Facebook. Our family respects our decision as I have siblings who do not allow sharing of there children either.

  15. Jeanie Kochis Avatar
    Jeanie Kochis

    I respect and agree with you on this subject. For years, I have marveled (not in a good way) at the parents who allow their kids to put videos on YouTube of tours of their bedrooms, etc. or the parents themselves doing similar things, with all kinds of information about their kids online. When my fifth child turned 16, I allowed her to finally make a few dance videos for YouTube, after a lot of contemplation. She competes in dance and was begging me to allow her to try and get a chance to be on the Ellen show. I monitor all of her activity online consistently. It’s time consuming, but to me, it is the only way to allow her to do these things. It was a difficult decision for me, because I feel very strongly about privacy and safety. We all have to live with our decisions, regardless. She is joining me in an online business we have both created and therefore, she will eventually have to put herself ‘out there’ to some degree. I’m just glad we are working closely together on this and I will be monitoring it all. I’m so fortunate that I have a daughter who wants to do this with me and loves to work with me. I feel it can be risky, but I’m glad we are in this together and I can guide her with her internet and social media activity. But there is no way I would do anything like this without completely monitoring her activities. And this year she will be 17 and I want to show her that I trust her instincts now as well, but that I will also be there right beside her. I think you have made the best decision to allow your kids’ lives to be private, until they are old enough to make those kind of decisions themselves. They will thank you for that I’m sure.

  16. amy Avatar

    I understand some of this but honestly, the part about the photos online didn’t make much sense to me, since all the examples you used were bad ones, like bad pictures i mean. I share photos of my kids, cute ones, like a sweet hug in front of the Christmas tree or running through a field of wildflowers, i hardly see how that could ever be embarrassing. i would never post a photo that i thought would ever embarrass my child. i say as long as you keep accounts private, don’t tag or hashtag any names, and don’t post pics that you know could/are embarrassing to your children (or anyone else for that matter) – it’s not an issue.

    my hot topic is selfies! this is a crisis.

  17. Hazel Avatar

    I agree with you on all counts. There is so much over-sharing going on the internet these days. It’s refreshing to see a blogger who doesn’t reveal all aspects of her private life. I don’t currently have kids but I would be the same as you if I did have some. And to those who judge you for not posting about your kids just ignore them. They obviously have some issues of their own. So many people aren’t aware of the dangers of posting pictures of their kids online. I was glad to see the local news running a story about turning off your location settings on your smart phone as those tag pictures with your GPS location! A mother in the story was horrified to learn she’d been broadcasting the GPS location of her house while taking pictures of her daughter down to the actual rooms the picture was taken in. Not only can sex predators get a hold of this information but smart burglars will now know your daily routine. Better to be safe than sorry & just set your security settings to high.

  18. Megan Avatar

    I love that you posted this! I often have to ask friends to take pictures down of my daughter and before attending events we have to ask people to not post any picture they take on social media. Some have ignored our request and argued with us about this decision, but I have told them every reason you have listed here as to why we don’t post on social media! It amazes me how people can’t respect others parenting decisions.

  19. Therry Avatar

    Great article. I don’t have kids and partly is because the society / government etc wants to tell me how to raise them and I don’t agree with many of those things. I agree with everything you said. I am from Europe and I have many friends who refuse to be on Facebook because “it’s full of liars” (true), hardly ever share pictures or have never shared a picture of their kids. Thankfully, there are still women who are happy and fulfiled without feeling the constant need of reassurance, support and likes from a bunch of people they might not even be close friends with. I was trying to make a point and I told my husband you can find out a lot about someone based on their Facebook posts / shares. I told him I even know where some people live and I’m not even friends with them. Now people even share their location at all times and check in everywhere they go. My cousin and his wife went on vacation and everyone learned from Facebook that their house was empty.

    Now my question is about grandparents. They love to show off their grandkids and have even less of a right to do so. My MIL would probably be very pissed if I wouldn’t let her share pics on Facebook. And she wouldn’t even ask for permission. How do people deal with that?

  20. Katie Avatar

    You are still able to open people’s “private” accounts without much effort. I was checking to see how secure my husband’s twitter account was. If I did a general search for his account and tried to click on it it would tell me it was private. But if I clicked on the results in a different way it would access it completely. I was talking with my niece about it and we then checked all of her “private” SM accounts and we were able to access them all. We have both since shut down all SM accounts.

    1. Nona Avatar

      Thanks for telling us your experience. Very interesting. Very…concerning.

      I really do believe that we have very little true privacy anymore — and that’s the case even without using social media.

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