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Stop what? Well, lots of things actually: We need to stop buying unhealthy foods, feeding them too much sugar, and not giving them enough time outside to play.
The thing that I’ve noticed in an increasing amount lately that we also really need to stop doing:
Letting our Kids be Picky!
Yes, I said letting.
Yes, I mean letting because we allow them to develop this habit. I’ve been to other countries, I’ve seen kids scarf down olives or snails or even balut (yes, really).
Let’s also not forget, as our parents were so keen to remind us, that there are children in the world who would be grateful for any food at all. I certainly heard about the starving children around the world when I wasn’t happy about eating my dinner. Do our kids hear about them?
In fact, I actually remember saving my birthday money once to donate to Food for the Poor because I actually felt bad about those starving kids.
Was it Guilt?
Probably, but it encouraged me to save money for those in need and to eat my freaking brussels sprouts, so I’m grateful for it.
Parents in my parents’ generation also had a pretty set in stone menu each night at dinner. They served:
- What mom cooked
- Hunger
We were never forced to eat, but we most certainly didn’t get to choose what we were having for meals. We were *shockingly* expected to eat what was served. My parents didn’t seem to feel much sympathy for my plight of not liking certain foods.
In fact, when I saw this movie in theaters as a kid (yes, I’m that old), this line seemed somewhat familiar:
Most of the time, this included vegetables and wasn’t a food that I loved. But I ate it. And I didn’t complain. And now I’m all grown up and not a picky eater at all.
You Know What Else?
Most of us managed to make it through childhood without starving. We eventually learned to eat foods we didn’t like. We don’t even need therapy for it.
Our parents had better things to do than cajole or encourage us to eat foods we didn’t like. They certainly had better things to do than open a 24/7 restaurant devoted to our whims.
They also didn’t lose sleep over our food preferences.
Have our Kids Gotten Soft?
Let’s think about this. As kids, most of us ate vegetables. And meat, or we didn’t eat that meal. We made it to adulthood, and though I could argue it on a few points, most of us are relatively competent adults.
Yet, everywhere I go in the US, kids are coddled and catered to.
They are asked questions that I certainly never heard and you probably didn’t either.
Questions Like:
“What would you like for dinner?”
“Would you like a snack?”
“Do you want the Dora gummy bears or the Minions ones?”
They are Told Things Like:
“Oh, that’s ok if you don’t like that, we can make something else.”
or:
“You don’t have to eat your meat and vegetables before having dessert… I’ll get it for you now.”
And those aren’t even the worst examples I’ve heard.
In fact, at a recent meal at our house where there were 18+ kids, all of the parents served each of their own kids food. (The food was amazing too- steak, grilled veggies, etc.).
I told the collective group of kids that there was fruit salad after dinner for everyone who ate their veggies.
One kid got upset and started complaining because “But mommy, I want fruit salad right now.”
At which point, he was catered to and given fruit salad by his parents without having to eat other food, in front of all the other kids who did have to eat what was served to them.
Seriously?
This is a small and insignificant example but it violates two social principles that I was taught as a kid:
- When you are at someone’s house, you eat what is given and you thank them for it.
- Free food is always good food.
Somewhere along the line, we started thinking that our kids get input into what they should eat. We forgot an important point:
Parents are Responsible for the Nutrition of their Children
This is a relatively simple concept but I don’t see many parents who seem to understand it.
Think about this- a toddler (or any age child, really) is not the best judge of what should be eaten. He or she is also not the best judge about when bedtime should be or how often he or she should bathe.
That toddler is probably not even an expert at wiping his own bottom yet, but somehow we think we should give him input into his nutrition.
When studies increasingly show that the foods a child eats in the first few years of life are vitally important for lifetime health, we think we should outsource that decision to a three year old?
Are You Kidding Me?
Would we let our kids decide how often they should go to school? Or change their underwear?
What about deciding how much TV they should watch, or whether or not getting a pet tiger is a good idea?
So why are we letting kids dictate something even more important?
Yes, it Might be “Mean”
In a child’s eyes to not be given the food they want. It can also seem “mean” to give them boundaries and rules, but these things are necessary to avoid having whiny, entitled children who live in our houses until they are 40.
Will it Still be Cute Then?
Is it cute when a grown-up comes to your home for a meal and refuses to eat the meal you’ve prepared simply because they don’t like one of the ingredients?
I know a few of these adults, but I’m certainly not raising any!
Listen to this podcast episode on Umbrella Parenting and Raising Children With Strong Coping Skills with Dr. Jen Forristal.
Here We Go…
I know, I know, I hear the objections now.
What about kids with allergies? Or special needs? Or disorders that affect their ability to eat certain foods?
Of course, there are exceptions to any rule and these circumstances dictate a little more leeway, but I have yet to find any condition that completely kept a parent from feeding their child any healthy food whatsoever. If your child has a condition that makes him allergic to anything but chocolate milk and cotton candy, I apologize, but I haven’t encountered this yet.
What I have encountered are many children who think they are a special snowflake with special privileges who get served special food.
I’ve also encountered a lot of obese kids. And kids with health problems.
And it Breaks my Heart
Because kids don’t buy happy meals on their own.
They also don’t habituate themselves to crap foods on their own. We feed them bland white foods and then wonder why they only like bland white foods.
I know because I did it to my first child at a doctor’s recommendation.
And he was a freakin’ picky eater for a couple of years before I realized my kid was going to be an inconsiderate jerk when it came to food if I didn’t change something.
So I Did
I think they call that parenting.
It certainly doesn’t mean I always have the answers (or even that I usually do).
But I do know this:
It took me a few months to help transition my picky temper tantrum pitching child to an adventurous eater who loves broccoli. I know it is possible.
I also know I haven’t had a picky kid since him. You know what changed?
Me.
Tough Love
Here’s a dose of something we aren’t giving our kids (or ourselves) very much: tough love.
As parents, we owe it to our children to help them become well-adjusted, healthy members of society. One of the many small ways we can do this is by teaching them the basic idea that food is for nutrition first and enjoyment second.
That we only get one body and we should take care of it.
And that it isn’t ok to live off of granola bars and chicken nuggets. That they will survive eating brussels sprouts and meat. And *gasp* even salads and olives and beets and every other food that we think kids won’t like.
Because at the end of the day… if our kids grow up fat, picky and sick, we have only ourselves to blame.
Dear parents… let’s stop the picky epidemic. Today.
Important note: This post addresses the attitudes relating to food as much as the foods themselves. Of course, there are times and medical conditions when a varied diet may not be possible or recommended and these would require adjustment. I’m certainly not advocating that we force feed our kids or never give them any choices at all, only that we encourage an adventurous attitude toward trying new food and a kind and respectful attitude when refusing foods, especially after trying them. (For example, “no thank you, I’m not hungry” rather than whining and complaining). That is a manners issue and not a food issue at all. It is also something that every parent can work with a child on.
I wrote this post years ago about our guidelines for meal times and how we encourage our children to eat a variety of foods in case it is helpful for more specifics.
Yes! I dont serve kid food. They might not be adventurous eaters, but they love real food.
Well said Wellness Mama! This same line of reasoning applies to almost every other “parenting dilemma” Parents are in charge, and children should obey cheerfully and immediately. Scientific research has proven over and over that the happiest children are the most obedient children..
I would like to see thr research that links happiness to obedience.
some of the comments on here are shocking. The glee with which parents discuss being the boss. Just horrid and I feel sorry for the parents who were obviously psychologically damaged by their own upbringings and think the only way to parent is by being a controlling dictator. Very, very sad
Those complaining about Katie’s tone, please just don’t read on… 😛
Nobody said anything about being a controlling dictator. Children need boundaries and a sense of what is right and wrong instilled in them… lovingly, of course, it goes without saying, and the two things are actually compatible, even if it might sound a bit extragalactical to some. Then, when they are grown up, they will be responsible persons and useful citizens, someone nice to be around, and not like some 40-year-old jerks who think they’re the centre of the universe, treat everyone else as if they existed to cater to them, and expect their parents to pay the rent of their apartment for them.
There is nothing sad about parents teaching their children, nothing sad about parents being responsible and holding themselves accountable for their children’s education and wellbeing. Also, I’d be careful of using the words “psychological damage” for what you’re alluding to. You’re being rather impertinent, if you don’t mind my saying so. If you’re ready to let your three-year-old decide what she’s going to eat, who she’s going to slap in the face when she wants to, and when you’re going to bed, go ahead… just remind me not to hire her, or anyone like her, when she’s grown up.
Where is the “like” or up vote button when you need it! Love this LaraS!
Couldn’t agree more!
My daughter is pretty adventurous with food but I struggle with my younger son. He seems to have sensory issues and will not eat ANY veggies or fruits except peas and the puréed squeezie pouches. He has been taken off dairy so now his tiny list of foods has gotten even smaller (he won’t eat any nondairy yogurts) If anyone can recommend a resource to help in this, I would be so grateful!
If he likes the squeeze pouch things, buy reusable ones. Purée fruits and vegetables together. Be sneaky!
Hey, I dont know what kind of food issues/allergies you are dealing with, but two of my sons have a ton of food allergies, and we found a facebook group called sarah’s fpies clubhouse that is great. Moms share all their tricks, frm recipes for only a few foods to dealing with birhday parties. There area lot of wonderful fbgroups dealing with that kind of stuff. Also, a nutritionist and food therapy may help too. They give you lots of pointers to overcome issues. One of my sons is so picky and we held the line at first but he didnt care and just wouldnt eat, and his weight got too low, so we caved and i know im spoiling him foodwise now but its that or him becoming badly underweight. The squeezy pouches are great because you can mix so may healthy things, like mild bqby spinach and they wont even know. Freezing works well too, making smoothies or pops with the puree. Kids love anything frozen or on a stick. Anyway, good luck!
Hi Meredith, you are right to suspect an underlying condition. My daughter does not eat any fruit and most vegetables and she is now 35 years old. It has to do with coarse texture. This is not a “fussy” trait but an actual condition and extends to clothing – only very soft fabrics are wearable. Unfortunately I can’t remember the name of the condition but I am sure Google will come up with it.
My husband is the same. He says it’s a texture issue, but I can’t see how watermelon and broccoli both won’t down, even if pureed in soup or something! Our family is on the craziest diet–I need a Venn Diagram to feed everyone. I wish I could be polite enough to allow my kids to eat Country Crock spread on white bread and cereal when they visit their grandparents, but I don’t. We’re picky to the point of others taking it as rude (sorry, the kids can’t have Dairy Queen, even if Nana is treating…). If only the rest of everyone didn’t eat such garbage a lot of the time! I don’t know how you do it and still maintain some grace. I shudder when people offer my kids Goldfish crackers or random boxed cereal “snacks.” Our diets are far from perfect at home, but I don’t feed them food from boxes as a general rule of thumb. My oldest only wants to eat white-ish foods even though I prepare a lot of different things and give lots of choices. My youngest is starting to turn up her nose at everything starting the meal with “I HATE broccoli” and then flings it off her plate. Joy! Huzzah on the manners lessons! We’re just a bunch of barbarians over here. I really am at a loss sometimes how to navigate all the food issues and I like your blog header that it really ought not be this difficult! Sigh!
My kids eat a lot better since I put them on juice plus. The more veggies you get into their bodies, the more the body craves it! Taste buds will change.
Yes! We have Autism in the house (multiple children) and texture and looks, smell, can all limit a varied diet. I have done as suggested and snuck healthy foods into dishes where they “disappear”, such as avocado into their berry smoothie. I did it a number of times asking how it was and receiving positive feedback before I told them what was in it. They now dislike their smoothie without the avocado, which was unheard of before. There is hope!
I completely agree that we need to teach our kids good manners and how to make healthy choices as an investment in their health.
The language and tone of this article seemed different from what I’m accustomed to reading on this site. It left me with a funny feeling…
Sorry it wasn’t all rainbows and unicorns today, but there are some days I hit my limit and the snark comes out, especially on topics that I’m passionate about…
Hi Katie,
I liked this article, But I have to agree the tone is very different in this article compared to rest of the posts.
I think her tone was appropriate. Her frustration directed at parents who cater to their children’s every whim was clearly articulated. As a parent of 5 small children who has witnessed other parents give in to their children over and over, then wonder why their kid is a picky brat 10 years later,I feel her tone was spot on. Sometimes you just need to tell it like it is and be direct so no one misunderstands your meaning.
Spot on…..and yes too many parents cater to their children’s every whim. Mothers are not short order cooks and children must be taught to respect and be thankful for their food and the efforts to prepare it. Children are taught good nutritional habits and self care by responsible parents. It’s too easy to give them junk food and call it dinner. Katie, your children are very blessed indeed! ?
From the moment our children started to eat should food I used a small food grinder to make their food. I simply used what we ate for any given meal, ground it up and fed it to them. Since we already eat healthy I didn’t need to adjust the salt or the seasoning. I let them get used to the food we ate. Sometimes they wouldn’t eat it and I would supplement with nursing. Sometimes they wanted to play with it and eat it off their fingers. It made a mess but they were still being exposed to the way I cooked. They are all much older now and very rarely do we have issues and if we do it is always about control. It’s up to them if they decide to go hungry. I provided them food. And I refuse to be a short order cook.
We feed our baby girl much the same way, but I don’t really grind stuff up. I just cut it I smaller pieces. I’m getting a little frustrated because lately she’s just been throwing her food and it’s hard to get her to eat the veggies. All she wants is fruit! (Or pasta if we’re having it) she’s only 11 months old, so I don’t feel like she’s old enough to make her go to bed hungry… And she won’t bc she’s still nursing as well…but any ideas on how to get her to eat the healthier parts of the meal too? I don’t want to cater to her and give her something else, but I also don’t want to be up nursing her all night bc she wouldn’t eat our food and now she’s hungry…
Honey, If you walked on water, we’d call you Jesus. Your female, normal and a mother, enough said.
I’ve got a long way to go before I’m anywhere near that good!
You have enough on your plate without beating yourself up. Do the best you can, believe it or not, you and your kids will survive their growing up and they WILL appreciate you.
Katie, while I agree with much of what you said, at 49 years of age, I still have bad memories of the dinner table as a small child and a mother who put the food on the table and that was it. I had an aversion to textures of many foods that I outgrew eventually. Dealing with a picky eater can go the slow and easy route to get the same results in the end.
I was fortunate that I worked with 2 mothers of grown children when my kids were little. One had 6 children and one had 7 children, not to mention the grandchildren between the two of them. After talking with them about picky eaters, I combined what they said with my own ideas and here is what I came up with.
They had to try two bites of a food, even if they had it before and didn’t like it. If they didn’t want to eat it, they had to say, “No, thank you.” Politely. NO, I repeat, NO screaming or whining. If they didn’t want to eat what I made, they could fix their own food but with only one choice: a peanut butter sandwich ( I am not a paleo person, nothing against it but not for me also, it wasn’t well known at the time). I was not willing to have the dinner table turn into a battleground and I was not willing to make another meal when there was one already prepared. Eventually, the oldest and pickiest got sick of peanut butter and began to eat a bigger and bigger variety of foods. Now, he is probably the most health conscience of all of them. His diet is far from perfect but for a 21 year old who is mostly moved out working full time and going to school full time, he does pretty well. Now, 2 of my kids are grown and one is nearly grown. They eat most things and don’t complain. They each have things that they don’t like and if they don’t want what I made, they fix their own meal. All are healthy. All maintain a healthy weight.
I did this because I really wanted my kids to feel that they had control of themselves. I wanted them to be able to say, “No,” to certain things but to also be polite and respectful. I also didn’t want them to feel like disliking something meant that they were misbehaving somehow. I really wanted them to be able to say “no” to other things that seemed wrong, if they ever came up in life.
I would like to add that no way, no how, not in this lifetime, did they run the show about what was for dinner. Some of the pickiest kids I knew were also the most overweight. The kid would “only” eat chicken nuggets or some other crap almost every night. Mainly, this is easier for the parent. I don’t say this as a criticism, but a reality that can be easily overlooked when our lives get hectic. Both parents working full time on different schedules is frequently not a “choice.” It wasn’t for me when my older 2 were little. It was a financial necessity. My job was high stress and because of the unpredictable nature of my work, I frequently had to work over time and rotate on-call hours (get to work in no more than 30 minutes after being notified).
My goal was to overcome picky eating without turning my kids into spoiled brats and without driving myself crazy. I didn’t want the evenings that I was home, especially when we were all there, to be unpleasant. Like my husband and myself at the time, lots of people are working weekends, holidays, and odd hours. All of us weren’t at the table at the same time very often. Also, dinner was often the end of a long and extremely stressful day.
All I can tell you is that this worked for us and was relatively painless and not frustrating most of the time. As a former picky eater myself, I didn’t want to take the hard line with food but still wanted the kids to eat fairly healthy without a lot of fuss. I am not saying that this approach is right for everyone but it was right for me.
Thanks Jackie for the thoughtful and helpful comment. I agree with you on all counts and I’m going to edit the post to include a link to a much older post I’ve written that includes many of these points: https://wellnessmama.com/8024/food-rules/
To clarify- I follow much of the same thing (though our kids can only get leftovers if they truly won’t eat a food), and make them try only one bite of each food before requesting more of any food. It has worked really well for us as well.
I also absolutely agree with the “no thank you” and I think that is what frustrated me the most with recent cases is that there were two issues going on: the child’s refusal to try a food and the child’s disrespect/whining toward the parent. I love your solution that separates the manners and the food as two different issues.
So you will give some other leftovers if they wont eat the main meal at all? I am trying to figure this thing out myself.
What do you do when you have an extremely strong willed child who will absolutely under no circumstances take the ‘one bite’?
Hunger is a great motivator 😉
What a reasonable, balanced mother you are. So much common sense…..Love this!!
Lol… You should hear on the days I get into a rant about all of my little pet issues. Most days I can keep under control and just be nice but sometimes you just need the unvarnished truth
Hi Katie! I’ve been learning from your blog for years. I smiled and even laughed out loud when I read the especially snarky bits because it’s just so real. I feel like you are a friend who is having a rant and I’m honoured that you chose me to be a listener to your frustrations. 🙂
No need to offer any apologies. If readers are offended, that’s their problem. You wrote an amazing article! I laughed, I learned, I loved it!! I have some changes to make with my son (as does my husband) after reading your article. I appreciate your candor and will share this wonderful piece of parenting advice with my family and friends. Katie, your website has changed my life and health, and that of my family. I’m so very thankful about 4 years ago my friend said “check out this wellnessmama website”…and I did…and I changed every household cleaning product, every personal care product and everything I put in my grocery cart. I don’t know you, but what you do amazes me. Thank you for sharing your many gifts!
So true life isn’t always unicorns and rainbows but your nasty tone in the article is going to turn a lot of people off from being willing to hear what you’re saying. Also I find it ironic that you’re telling people that if their children grow up to be fat it’s the parents fault when you yourself appear to be somewhat fat.
Ok that was uncalled for. No matter what someone eats, there’s bound to be differences in body types. And her tone may have been snarky, but it wasn’t nasty. Please calm down.
She has a condition which affects her hormonal balance and is one of the few people I know who is actually doing something about it (among the cartloads of people I know who have the same condition and sit on their behinds all day content with stuffing themselves with pills and changing nothing).
She manages a household with six children whom she homeschools and for whom she cares for herself (as well as having a business, a garden, and who knows what else), so if her outward appearance doesn’t appeal to you, I’m dreadfully sorry, but I think we can agree she is healthy and full of energy regardless. Which we can’t say for the diabetic and obese or overweight children that make ONE THIRD of American children, which, sorry, but as someone from that remote place called “the rest of the world”, I think is a signal there is something seriously wrong with your society as a whole. And it takes bravery to speak out about it, because so many people dislike naked truths.
So woooooo!, Katie, go for it!!
Indeed it’s more about gratitide and parenting. At our table… There’s alot of “Wadda ya say” … and now our young ones say THANKYOU to the person that serves them without being told.
But this is the way I see it..
Health is important — but a part of being “healthy” is also enjoying your food and gatherings with family. It’s how you bond and create memories! We should look forward to eating.
– Also wether a child is picky or not, is simply not going to have a taste for most green. spinach, broccoli, avocados, etc.
This is why I make smoothies with almond butter, a dab of chocolate syrup, and sneak in spinach.
This is why I make broccoli and cabbage with left over bacon grease and or butter. More smiles
than complaints and that’s all we parents hope for.
When you are passionate, it resonates. These are the comments that most impress upon my heart…
Love all your recipes, thoughts, and thank you for your time and research. It’s most helpful.
I agree – I usually appreciate the tact and respectful candor of this site when discussing controversial topics like this. But this was a bit more judgemental than usual. I wonder if helpful tips would be better – I’m sure all “these” parents aren’t spineless. Life is hard and sometimes we need truth with gentle advice instead of judgment.
Robin, the fact that you think this subject is “controversial” disturbs me.
I found the article both respectful and unvarnished. Katie is shining a light on a critical topic. I found it refreshingly honest. Unfortunately, “gentle tips” don’t work for those parents who are the worst offenders – they want to stay in a state of oblivion, likely because, as you point out, life is hard. I am friends with many of these parents. But life being hard is no justification for sacrificing a child’s health. Someone needs to speak up for these poor children, and I am glad Katie is brave enough to do so. We wouldn’t provide “gentle tips” on why not to give your child a cigarette each day so why would be do so when the stakes are just as high with regular consumption of junk “food” in childhood?
Thank you, Mary, well said! And sometimes we need tough love, Robin. If I had 18 kids come over for dinner and none of them ate what I served, I’d be pretty pissed too.
I agree about the tone of the article, I get the point but it seemed a bit aggressive
Sometimes parents need a wake-up call. Life isn’t always warm and fuzzy and the truth can be hard to swallow. She spoke the truth in this article and she wouldn’t have done it if she didn’t care. I have so many friends who need to read this article because truly, what we feed our children and the habits we allow them to form are life vs. death.
Yaay Katie! May this be taken to heart! I was a very picky kid that was NOT catered to. I was still very picky for many years into adulthood but I made myself eat things I didn’t like anyway. Now I am on a very restrictive diet due to Hashimotos, candida and food allergies. And it’s just not a big deal that I can only eat about 20% of the foods in the universe and I don’t *like* about 50% of the things I can eat. I am so grateful my mom and caregivers insisted on being mature enough to make wise decisions so I could be empowered to do it on my own when I became mature!
This was one of the best articles I’ve read in a long time!
I completely agree! (: I loved this article! (:
Indeed!! I love this “soapbox moment” Wellness Mama! Great points and excellent blog. Thank you!
Completely agree. I am guilty of much of what you mentioned. I never had a choice of what I ate. I ate what was prepared for the family. Many parents, myself included have given too much control to their kids. $600. cell phones!
Way too indulgent. I am slowly changing, more boundaries, less accommodations
our table rule: Come to the meal thankful or walk away hungry. Thankful that dad has a job, mom has skills to cook, farmers know how to grow healthy foods. thankful to friends or family for inviting us over. Sometimes our children would get sent away from the table to adjust their attitude. They would be instructed privately on gratefulness. Games where played to introduce new foods, stories of far away places regarding food origin were told. meals were messy and loud, but all were grateful.
today I have two lovely, healthy, grateful, helpful teenagers, whom I honestly enjoy. We can take them anywhere and be assured that they will be polite, grateful and even adventurous in what they eat. Be brave parents, stay strong. 🙂
Xlnt article, Wellness Mama. A little history….. Our mother believed in serving balanced meals and always prepared healthy food, quite unlike our southern relatives who believed that our family ate “rabbit food.” We usually salad and vegetables with midday and evening meals. Needless to say, most of our cousins are obese and diabetic – yet we are not. I went on a hunger strike at about age 3 or 4. As a result, our parents agreed that if we had tasted something and did not like it, it was OK to say so. In my case, the disliked food was cold fried eggs and cold oatmeal (being the youngest, I awoke and had breakfast later than the rest of my family, who arose at the crack of dawn and had breakfast earlier). Quite unsurprisingly, now that I think about it, just about everything I tasted, I liked. The exceptions are sauerkraut, raspberries, rhubarb, and, one time avocados though I absolutely love avocados today. I have our mother to thank for a lifetime of healthier food choices. I did become a vegetarian and do not eat meat or meat byproducts, and that has been entirely my own decision although our parents did respect it. Thanks. Great article!
What a wonderful story, thanks for sharing. My son would eat the table if I let him, no problems with food.
I love your table rule: “Come to the table thankful and hungry.”
Amen! I’m using that rule for sure.
I love this! Good job!
Oh Jane I love this! I wanted to leave a comment- but you took the words right out of my mouth! To me the real issue is gratefulness and attitude. Of course kids can’t be expected to like every food put in front of them, but I do expect that they try it, and are grateful / appreciative of the work that went into the meal.
We had one major food fight with our oldest child when she was 7yo. She was newly adopted and trying to establish her boundaries, so she refused to eat what was served (chicken & mixed veg’s). After an hour of just sitting at the table, she finally fell asleep on the table. We put her to bed. The next morning, I fixed hot pancakes for her brother, and pulled her uneaten dish out of the refrigerator, slapped some cheese on the veg’s, & served it to her again. She finally caved in and ate 4 bites of it. Then I allowed her to have pancakes. She learned that she either eats what I serve or she goes to bed hungry. She is now 17 and we have NEVER had any other food battles since that time. Her younger brother & sister also learned and never learned “pickiness” as a result. I decided I’d rather fight one big battle one time than to fight lots of battles for the rest of life.
I agree 100% In my house growing up me & my 3 sisters ate what was cooked or we went hungry!That is how I have/am raising my kids. my daughter is now 19 & thanx me for making her eat certain things. My son who is 11 isn’t happy about the rule but its been that way his whole life. If he truly doesn’t like something I wont make him eatit again, at least not for awhile. Taste change so we try again in about 4-6 months. Sometimes he likes it & other times it’s still a no go.